What HAVE I Been Doing?

When we call friends or family, inevitably, someone will ask: “Whatcha been up to?” As a lead in to catching up.  Occasionally the question brings irritation, since what we’ve been doing says too much about the lack of excitement in our lives.  Even so, it can be a catalyst to sharing, and the reply can be:

“So glad you asked.”

In the week since I last wrote here, I blogged for Orange County on the idea of Mature Romance books. Would this be a successful genre? Mature Romances? I’d enjoy hearing your take on this idea.

On the recipe front, I came across cauliflower pizza crusts…seriously! I’ve tried almond flour crusts, which were yummy, but this was my first foray into cauliflower, though I have made cauliflower cheese “bread,” including a green chili version that is pretty yummy. I started with this recipe: Original Cauliflower Pizza Crust

1 cup cauliflower**
1 egg
1 cup mozzarella cheese
1/2 tsp fennel
1 tsp oregano
2 tsp parsley

toppings (make sure meats are cooked)

Preheat oven to 450 degrees Farenheit. Spray a cookie sheet with non-stick spray (or use parchment paper)

In a medium bowl, combine cauliflower, egg and mozzarella. Press evenly on the pan. Sprinkle evenly with fennel, oregano and parsley.

Bake at 450 degrees for 12-15 minutes (15-20 minutes if you double the recipe).

**Most of these recipes call for cooked, riced cauliflower, either fresh or frozen. Sometimes I will get fancy and steam my cauliflower but most of the time I toss the 12 ounce bag of frozen cauliflower into the microwave until it’s hot, then drain, and use my (favorite kitchen tool) stick blender to mash it.

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I made this as a pizza on Friday night and (sorry) gobbled it down too fast for pictures.  But the next morning I still had
some “dough” left.  Being of eclectic appetite, I decided to create a substitute for Indian Tacos (fried dough with all sorts of dangerously yummy toppings). While baking the crust, I cooked up some hot green chiles, then added eggs and cheese to the pan. Lacking fresh tomatoes (need to get to the market!) I used fire roasted salsa, and chopped up romaine lettuce as a garnish.  And it was GOOD.

On the writing front, I’ve been dusting off a series I started way back when, about a ranch in Northern New Mexico that serves as a resting place for people who need somewhere to decompress before easing back into their lives after battle. This first book concerns the daughter of a mercenary and a retired combatant. Both of them need to learn to forgive themselves for their past and trust each other if they’re going to have a future together.  It starts:

“She knew that walk.  With a slight hesitation in one leg he prowled like a wounded predator, conditioned to succeed against the most dangerous game of all.  Even limping, his reactions would be instantaneous, his balance superior.  By itself, his body would be a weapon.  He’d be the best man to have on your side in a battle.  After the battle, he’d unwind with a drink and a woman.  The drink would be strong and straight.  The woman would be bosomy and not too bright.  He’d very likely spend more time with the drink than the woman.”

So. Whatcha Been Up To???

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I AM a Writer, Yes I Am

First off, if you missed the message, the manic lady pin will soon be in the hands of Pamela Truesdale, through Random.org, since Gwynyfyr was too busy playing in the snow to pick. Congratulations Pamela and thank you all for participating. I’m going through my ridiculously large collection of funky jewelry so watch this space for further contests.

012It is a new year, with new ambitions and a new outlook . I have been a writer most of my life, though as Alex said on the fabulous sit com TAXI, most of us see ourselves as anything but who we really want to be.  In Alex’s case, he was the only taxi driver, everyone else was driving to support the life they thought they wanted. All too often I’ve heard “I’m going to write full time as soon as…” and the blank fills in with retirement, children growing up, other people’s dreams.  And they put off writing until it becomes their dream instead of their reality.

Anyone who has followed this blog knows I’m a major fan of Kristen Lamb’s blog, never more so than now.  She started out the year with an in our face blog about not defeating ourselves before we first put pen to paper (or pencil, or ink, or…you get it I’m sure) with Lies That Can Poison Your Dreams and followed up with three days of excellent writing tips, culminating in Talent is Cheaper than Table Salt, taken from a quote by Stephen King, which continues: “What separates the talented individual from the successful is a lot of hard work.” Her blog today is about stepping away from our comfort zones and putting our writing first.  Not necessarily ahead of paying the bills, but definitely ahead of mindlessly watching television, or trolling the Internet for the latest non-news from Hollywood.  Even more, it’s about mindset.

When someone asks “What do you do?” as in what is our major life focus, how many of us relate our current work position? Maybe we have a fascinating hobby we like to brag on. How often do unpublished or barely published writers declare, loud and proud, “I am a writer”? It’s marginally easier for other artists, since they can point to paintings, sculpture, wall art as proof of their abilities.  Writers can only point to a computer screen or a loose stack of printed paper. Those who have reached the level of e-publishing can show a Kindle file, only to hear: “Can I find you in a book store?”  Well, I do spend time wandering the aisles, imagining how MY books will look on the shelves, but I don’t think that’s the intent of the question. Nor is the question meant to put us on the  spot, it’s based on decades of assumptions about our profession. Times and perceptions are changing, let’s change along with them.

So in this New Year, having survived a non-end of the world and fully prepared for any apocalypse that might occur, let’s all stand up and declare “I AM a Writer.”  Yes, we are.

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New ‘N’ Naughty for 2013

Could there be a better way to start the New Year than a blog hop with an overwhelmingly impressive group of erotic writers. What the heck am I doing here?  Well, it looks like I’m moving into new territory, and some of my people are going to be a bit naughty.  Gabriel, brother to Mykhael from My Killer My Love is going to get an opportunity to redeem himself after he got involved with the wrong group and tried to destroy Kendra’s home. The Atrahasis send him to live among humans, with his powers suppressed, until he learns humility. That might take a while. Especially since he’s having these strange dreams about being with a woman he’s never met…

Problem is, I’m still struggling to name my female lead.  She’s bright, full figured, intensely loyal to her friends and a bit lonely since she dumped her fiance after one too many cracks about her needing to look more like the women he’d like to have around. So not happening, bozo. She’s house sitting for a friend while she gets her life together, but she’s having the strangest, hottest dreams about a man she’s never met…

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Gwynny

As you can see, I need a very special name for this extremely special woman.  So I’m asking for some help.  Anyone who010 comments with a name, I’ll put your name in a bowl, and Gwynny will tear herself away from her Kindle long enough to choose one of the papers in the bowl.  The random choice will win this manic lady pin…and if I use your name in Gabriel’s story, you’ll get naming credit.  How does that sound?  And yes, I can mail it to you no matter where you live!

There are also three fabulous prizes from Jennifer and Lisabet, including a $60 gift certificate to Eden’s Fantasy

visit Eden Fantasys at edenfantasys (dot) com and two other lucky winners will receive a $25.00 gift certificate to their choice of the following book sites: AmazonAll Romance eBooksBarnes & Noble, or Total-E-Bound.  So be sure to visit all the amazing blogs listed below. Each one will have a prize for you to win.

Adriana Kraft
Adriana Kraft
Alisha Paige/Ruby Vines
Addicted to Genre Bending
Ann Cory
Ann Cory
Cassandra Carr
Hot Blogging with Heart
Cherie Noel
Great Expectations
Diane Thorne
Diane Thorne – Erotic Romance Author
Donna George Storey
Sex, Food, and Writing
Donna Michaels
Romaginative Fiction-Donna’s Dish
Elise VanCise
Gladiator’s Pen
Harlie Williams
Harlie Williams, Writer
Helena Harker
Open the Door to Your Fantasies
Jennifer
Wright

Jennifer
Wright’s Blog
Justus Roux
Where Love and Erotic Know No Boundaries
Kayelle Allen
Unstoppable Heroes
Kelli
Scott

Lip
Service
Kendall McKenna
Love and Dog Tags
Lisabet Sarai
Beyond Romance
Lisa Carlisle
Lisa Carlisle’s News
Lyndi Lamont
Lyndi’s Love Notes
M. S. Spencer
M. S. Spencer Tale Spinner
Marie
Sexton

Marie
Sexton
May Water
May Water’s Erotica
Michelle Moon
Ink Dipped Moon
Mona Karel
Mona Karel
Blog
Naomi Bellina
Naomi Bellina Adventurous Erotic Romance
Nicole Morgan
Bringing Passion To Life
Rose Anderson
Calliopes Writing Tablet
Roz Lee
Roz Lee
S. Dora
S. Dora
Sapphire Phelan
Sapphire Phelan’s Passion Corner
Stormie Kent
Stormie Kent’s Musings
Suz deMello
Fearless, Fast-paced Fiction
Synithia Williams
Synithia Williams
Victoria Pinder
Victoria Pinder Romance Author
Virginia Nelson
Virginia Nelson, Author

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Enough Silliness

Let’s take a quick break from my world of ice fog and skinny dogs to discuss something serious (okay, quit your snickering in the back)  My guest today is Dr. Dennis Lewis, author of Dysfunction: Identify it. Own it. Eliminate it. Dr. Lewis is the real deal, a practicing psychologist in California.  {Brief breath to avoid the too obvious one liner} I’m honored to host him, with a brief essay on dysfunctional relationships and a wicked recipe for home made bread.  Can you smell it baking now?  May I introduce Dr. Lewis (polite applause)Dysfunction - Click Image to Close

Dissolving the epoxy of a dysfunctional relationship                    

Are you stuck in relationship that everyone has told you to get out of? Do you ask yourself in the mirror why you are staying? Do excuses bubble forth that delay you from making a decision? Such head-games ignore the fact that the glue that keeps you tied together is the hostile-dependent relationship.

Domestic violence is the best example. The reporter covering the story of a woman murdered by her spouse may marvel that she had separated multiple times from the abuser only to go back. The sociological analysis points to many factors: poverty, insecurity, lack of resources, homelessness, depression, lack of support. Yet from an outsider’s perspective, she had alternatives. Ultimately, the supposedly benevolent observer reverts to blaming the victim. In Social Psychology, this is known as the essential attribution error.

The error is to attribute the behavior to a voluntary decision by the person and impugn her character. In reality, the attractive force controlling the behavior is the vortex of the hostile dependent relationship. You can see this in other instances of unbreakable bonds. Situations include bosses with subordinates, military drill instructors, or dysfunctional family relationships.

Individual motivation draws on multiple factors in any given situation. Hostile dependency merely tends to pull the same players together over and over again. Why the participants act out the same repetitive dance can be traced to their individual dynamics, and such an analysis can be theoretically interesting. But the glue in the process is hostile-dependency.

The individual who recognizes this has one more tool at his or her disposal for escape. The awareness of the source of the pull will enable you to consider your options on level ground. Instead of an unnamed impulse pulling for a precipitous decision, you get to delay, to weigh the alternatives, and actually to make up your mind. In your attempt to separate, you can act with purpose instead of reflex. In this mindset, the alternatives that are available to you become more real and thereby attainable.

You might still need some support to stick with your decisions, but recognizing the taffy-like nature of the hostile dependent relationship will give you authorization to make the break. Summon up your courage. Recognize the hostility coming from the other person, and then stand on your own.  You’ll be healthier once you do.

***STANDING OVATION***

Thank you Dr. Lewis

Rustic Wheat Bread

9 oz Water

3 Tbs Honey

1 ½ Tbs Butter

2 tsp yeast

1 ½ tsp salt

1 ½ Cups White flour

½ cup rye

½ cup whole wheat flour

½ cup whole rolled oats

1 Tbs Seminole flour if you have it.

2 Tbs Sunflower seeds

1 Tbs rice

2 Tbs Corn Meal

2 Tbs Nuts

2 Tbs Bulgar

1 Tbs Barley Malt

Optional: 2 Tbs flax seeds

2 Tbs Almond Meal

1 Tbs Millet

Mix in bread machine on dough setting. Remove and refrigerate over night. Remove and form. Air rise for 1 ¼ hours.

Place in warm 200 degree over X 20 minutes. Turn on oven to 395 for 17 minutes. Reduce heat to 350 for 20 minutes.

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About Firsts

Since this is the first new years I’ll face alone in a long long time, I started thinking about other significant firsts. We all 013have them. First dates, first kiss, first…the list is endless. In keeping with my writing, I can reveal the first romance I read would have been a Romantic Suspense by Mary Stewart, possibly Airs Above The Ground and the first Historical Romance would have been Elswyth Thane’s Yankee Stranger. The common denominator being horses. Yeah, I was a horse crazy kid and it’s carried on throughout my life, though I had to make a choice between horses and dogs a few decades back since I could not do justice to both.
After the move to New Mexico, we had the space for a horse but not the resources, at least not right now. I’ve learned to enjoy them vicariously, through friends and blogs, and lots of wonderful Facebook pictures. Especially this picture, which shows a plethora of firsts.Melissa's Gelding

This is her first horse, and the gelding’s first person of his very own. How cool is that, and what great parents she has,to make so many dreams come true.

So we’ll move into this New Year with memories behind us and dreams in front.  I hope to follow this new couple through their journey together, and share a few more horse stories vicariously.

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So…Christmas. Let’s Get Through It Together

It’s coming up to the BIG DAY for kids and families and department stores, not to mention on line industries.  All around me friends, acquaintances and fellow writers fill their blogs and Facebook presences with greetings of the season.  I’m not really feeling the excitement this year and I bet there are a lot of people out there in the same boat.

While preparing a blog for LERA, my local RWA chapter, I reacquainted myself with a lovely piece of writing from my teen years, Desiderata.  I can never read it without hearing it in Leonard Nimoy’s voice…yep I was one of those geeky kids who had the album  Two Sides of Leonard Nimoy which includes the Balled of Bilbo Baggins.  Sigh, wish I had it now!

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be critical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy.

© Max Ehrmann 1927

We have a right to be here, and a right to be happy.  Blessings of the season to one and all

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Friday Linky-Links and A Winner

Not that I’m going to be doing links every Friday but it seems like a good day to make suggestions on interesting blogs.  006Especially since the yards are a sheet of ice and the dogs are going goofy.

First off, Kristen Lamb has gone to the silly side in her last two blogs: End of the World as we Know it and Holiday Spirit

These are both put down your coffee before reading posts.  Just want to warn you!

This time of year leads me to wax philosophical, and I’ve gone slightly nuts with chapter blogs.  On LERA I’m recalling that wonderful prose poem I heard when I was young (yeah, I was young at one time!) Desiderata and on the Orange County blog, Does Anybody Care it’s all about grammar rules and what readers really want.

The winner of a Gift Certificate of their choice is TRIX.  I’ve send you a private message

I’ve not yet received any requests to be in a drawing for an e-copy of one of my books.

Have a great weekend and don’t miss an opportunity to say “I Love You.” Except maybe to the cashier at Wal Mart, unless you really do.

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The NEXT Next Big Thing

Yeah, I did a Next Big Thing before the Great Vanilla Extract Creation along with that fabulous Secret Santa Blog Hop.  But I’ve been tagged again, and I really wanted to share the creation of this story. This time the tag was from fellow Black Opal Books author Zrinka Jelic AND Katja Willemsen . I’m going to tell you all about my next book by answering these questions and then to tag more authors about their Next Big Thing. So here I go!
What is the working title of your next book? Right now, it’s Gabriel’s Story, just so I have somewhere to store the files in Word Perfect.
Where did the idea come from for the book? In My Killer My Love , Gabriel is the half brother and nemesis of Mykhael.  He attempts to seduce Kendra and when that fails he tries to kill her.  If you’ve read the book you know what happens to him and as I was writing that scene my maniacal laughter (take THAT you jerk) scared the Salukis.
What genre does your book fall under? Paranormal Erotic Novella
Which actors would you choose to play your characters in a movie rendition? Ah, the tough question.  Cause Gabriel was disgustingly handsome in MKML and I’m writing him now as hot hot. I know my heroine is big and

From that scene in the glade when Gabriel tried to seduce Kendra.  Who do you think should play him? courtesy of farconville at FreeDigitalPhotos...

From that scene in the glade when Gabriel tried to seduce Kendra. Who do you think should play him? courtesy of farconville at FreeDigitalPhotos…

beautiful, so among major players Kate Winslet would be good as long as she keeps up her weight.  I’ve started a Pinterest page: Gabriel’s Story
What is the one-sentence synopsis of your book?  In punishment for betraying his code, an immortal enforcer must learn humility among humans.
Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency? I’m leaning to self publish
How long did it take you to write the first draft of your manuscript? It will probably three months, maybe less if I can get my rear in gear and sit down to write.
What other books would you compare this story to within your genre? The idea came to fruition during a workshop with Angela Knight. I’m reaching for that wonderful combination of dedication, humor, courage and smoking hot she produces.

Who or What inspired you to write this book? I thought killing off Gabriel was a just ending, possibly because he represented so many way too handsome self centered men I’ve dealt with. Then readers started asking for his story, pointing out that love really should be able to “improve” the very worst characters.  And I thought Hmmmm.  The other inspiration was my own imagination going wild when I fed dogs late at night, with the world outside the windows dark and no way to know if anyone is watching.  And again Hmmmmmmm.
What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest? Other than the redemption through love idea, my heroine is full bodied and happy with herself.  Plus she’s doing a huge secret favor for a friend, which is how she ends up feeding dogs in a brightly lit room, not knowing who might be watching.
Here are some fabulous authors I’ve tagged to tell you about their Next Big Thing! First from the Secret Santa Blog Hop:

Haley Whitehall who really gets into her historical fiction!

Christine Morehouse who lives to rock the muses.

And just ’cause I think they’re fabulous, plus they’ve done great Next Big Thing posts

Greta Van Der Rol – Her NBT is a sequel to a great “lost in space, rescued by a hottie” story.  Especially since the hottie in question is a total jerk at first

Doranna Durgin – Her NBT is a Reckoner story but she has so many great ideas swirling around in her head, you really need to keep an eye on her!

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Secret Santa Blog Hop Final Answer

Secret Santa Blog Hop Day TwoSo I borrowed from daytime television games. Heck, I’ve been borrowing Mr Hot for three days now! We’re coming down to the wire on the fabulous grand prize Secret Santa Blog Hop.  Don’t forget to check out Blog Central for more entries in the drawing for a Kindle Fire.  And don’t forget to be VERY sure your entries are acknowledged!008

On with the final steps for vanilla extract.  We left off with the sliced and cut vanilla beans in their containers, waiting for the Piece de Resistance:  The vodka.

I generally pour with my right hand but I needed that hand to click the camera button (are there any left handed cameras???)  You want to fill up those 010containers so you cover the beans.  Seal up the container, give it a shake, then put it away in a dark place for at least a month.  Pull it out from time to time to give it another shake.  Soon you’ll have rich yummy pure vanilla extract.

You might wonder if this really works, or am I just spinning another fable.  Here’s proof: after less than 24 hours the vodka has begun to pull color (and flavor!) from the vanilla beans.  Sure wish my stories would work that fast!021

If you go into a spate of cooking, or use it up in some other fashion, just add more vodka, rum, cognac, whatever,shake and let it set again for about a week.  In maybe six months you’ll want to pour off the liquid into another container, let the vanilla pods dry, cut them up, and add them to a canister of sugar, for vanilla sugar.  Now doesn’t that sounds just sooo gourmet???

So, for the final QUESTION:  Hmmm, what could it be??? Ah, here you go: In My Killer My Love what was the name of the Overlords who tried to control Mykhael and Kendra?

Just so you know, no one has gotten yesterday’s question right yet. Oops.  Everyone got Baron’s name right!

Since it is the season, and I’m really want to spread the love, if you haven’t read one or either of my books, I’m going to do an e-book gift, in addition to the gift card. Just let me know if you’re interested in being part of that drawing.  You can send a private message to tsent@ix.netcom.com

Don’t forget to hit Blog Hop Central to gather up lots of chances for those prizes, and that’s here: http://www.tabithablake.blogspot.com From Tabitha’s blog you can hop out to the other participants, for even more chances.  Just one more day!

Tomorrow (Thursday December 19) I’m going to do another “Next Big Thing,” this time an erotic novella sequel to My Killer My Love.  Stop by and let me know how it’s sounding to you.

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Secret Santa Blog Hop Day Two

Back again for Day Two of the huge blog hop/vanilla extract fun time. And yeah that hot guy is back again.  We get to share him for these three days. And I’ll repeat the ways you can really rack up entries for a chance at that Kindle Fire, once we get to the next step of the Vanilla Extract. I’m going to share the quick way to make extract. If you want to really get into it, you can follow Instructables directions which also include a lot of in depth information along with the intense directions.003

Mine’s a bit easier. Now, extract isn’t usable right away, but once Christmas baking is over with no one does much for a month or so anyway, and it will be ready for Valentine’s day. Some people keep it around to flavor drinks also, if you’re so minded.  You got your glass bottles, right?

004Vanilla beans can be found for a ridiculous price in health food and gourmet stores.  Or you can buy them in bulk on line.  These came from Saffron Imports and are much more reasonably priced. Bit of trivia, the vanilla is a pretty vine, related to orchids, and does best in a jungle atmosphere.  Not so great in New Mexico!

Directions call for a very sharp knife.  For me that means an Xacto knife, especially since we 006have them in excess since Tom used them to cut mats.  Carefully slice lengthwise.  Don’t go all the way through since you want to expose the middle but don’t want to split the bean.  Cut horizontally in two to three places on the bean.  I’m using three beans for each small container since I want to make a nice dark extract…plus I have a LOT of vanilla.  I’m folding the beans into the glass bottles, so there will be room for the lid to close tight once the vodka is added.  You can also use cognac or pretty much any sort of alcohol for an extract. If you use water, you make an infusion, or a really strong tea.

Now, for the Secret Santa part of the blog.  Remember, there are THREE WAYS to get more entries for the drawing. One for following my blog. One for leaving a comment and another for answering my question.

For that special chance, here is tonight’s QUESTION: In My Killer My Love what relationship was Gabriel to Mykhael?

You’ll want to link back to Blog Hop Central to gather up lots of chances for those prizes, and that’s here: http://www.tabithablake.blogspot.com From Tabitha’s blog you can hop out to the other participants, for even more chances. There are over forty great writers involved in this hop…I’m finding a lot of new books to read!

I’m going to be drawing a name from those who enter through this blog for a gift card of your choice, whether Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or Black Opal Books.  See you tomorrow for the finishing touches on the vanilla extract.

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