What Shape is our Shape in? #MFRWAuthor

When I first thought about sharing my shapewear experiences,  I had in mind some humor, some pathos, something along the lines of the great brassiere debacle. Which I thought I’d shared here, hmmmm. I’ll have to hunt it up and share later. More musings


serious thoughts

on living larger than life size.

As far as the shapewear. I had a prestigious judging assignment on the east coast, and I wanted to look as good as I possibly could. Which meant maybe not quite so large? A bit more svelte? Less opera star, more pop star? Well maybe not THAT much of a change but just something…better.

An ad came up on FaceBook (good ol’ FB) for this miracle shapewear. I saw a multitude of full bodied women pulling on these wonder garments, smiling the whole time at how much nicer they looked. “Never Rolls Down,” the ads said. “Look the way you’ve always wanted to look.

Well, okay. I checked the size charts and {{sigh}} my measurements were a bit more generous than their largest size. Still, nothing ventured, right? Right. I sent off the order and waited. Waited. Waited. HERE they are. Open the package, shake out the miracle garment. It’s a warm day so pulling it on is a challenge. Finally it’s up most of the way, seams straightened, and I do that last roll up, the one where the models were all grinning.

It rolled down. Okay maybe I didn’t do it quite right. Pull it down. Pull it back up more carefully, smoothing it all the way.

It rolled. I was too big for the shapewear (and right there is another question…why not shapewear for we who are larger?) All righty. It went back into the package, back to the supplier. I got on the plane, judged a gorgeous collection of Salukis, looking the same as I always had. No one mentioned my size, my shape. I doubt anyone noticed. Except perhaps myself when I looked at the mirrors in the hotel exercise room.


My stage, before judging started

The reality is, we are pretty much never happy with the way we look. We want to be taller, leaner, more rounded, less rounded, straighter hair, curlier hair, older, younger, just different. And this rarely is someone else’s opinion, it’s in our own heads, our own selves.


Winners Bitch, and Reserve. These people didn’t notice I was large. The dogs don’t care

Face it no one can body shame us more than we body shame ourselves. We are all too often our own worst enemy






From now on, let’s concentrate on loving ourselves…sound like a plan?


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10 responses to “What Shape is our Shape in? #MFRWAuthor

  1. Huh. Right on, Mon. I don’t like wearing a bathing costume because I don’t look like I did 20 years ago. Think I’ll get over it? Hmmm. I’m my own worst body-shaming critic.


  2. Starr White

    Those that love us, love us with no regard to shape and size. xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

  3. and we love them back, setting up a never ending cycle of support


  4. Marina Doerfer

    I love you for you!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. OMG, Monica! I know I shouldn’t laugh, but I’ve seen those commercials, too (on FB, I guess you call ’em commercials), and you sound just like me! And there are so many more of us, too. We’re all our own worst enemies, but I don’t know how to overcome the problem. Guess we’re all just stuck. Or something. It’s really not fair. NOBODY looks like the ladies in the movies or TV (or, dog save us, fashion models).

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Leigh Parker

    Imomsohard does a blog about Spanx that is hysterical

    Sent from my iPad


    Liked by 1 person

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