I looked out this morning on dry ground and bright sunshine, then looked at the calendar. 
Five years ago, the acute care facility said they could do no more for my husband, and prepared to send him to a hospice center. Since, they told me, I could not take care of him myself. Obviously I took this as a challenge and the next day he was delivered to the front room, to stay on a hospital bed for the next three months. Looking out at the land he loved. I’m not saying this to ask for pity or praise, merely dredging up memories, and wondering if it’s time to put them away. To move on.
Is it ever time? How long do we wallow in memory before we move on? Wow that was kind of severe. Have I been wallowing? Might be. Just might be that I’ve been holding myself back from whatever it is I need to accomplish. Maybe the slow but steady progress in the garden, with writing, with the dogs, shows me I’m ready to move on?
Or maybe I don’t need to specifically move on, but I do need to make room for the present and the future. That sounds good. I’ve managed to finish and publish books since then. Managed to make it to meetings, judge dog shows. Write more books. I think he would have liked that…he enjoyed telling people about his wife the writer, the judge, the delegate.
For once I’m not going to dredge up an old song. If I did it would be memories, from CATS. He really liked that song, and the show. But, 
yeah, I’ll share some pictures. How can one live in a place like this, with dogs like these, and NOT share pictures? So, yeah, here’s one of him and one of the dogs. Enjoy. And if you have someone of your own, give them a hug for me. Thanks.
Mona Karel Author 
There is no timeline for moving on. When we are ready, we know. He was a handsome silver fox.
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yes, he was. Sending a huge hug your direction.
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Aw, Monica. I can’t believe it’s been five years. Tom was a great guy, and neither of you deserved what he went through.
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I was happy to have the time we had
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Your life is a tribute to the love you shared 💜
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thank you
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We begin “moving on” from day one, we just go in a different direction. Not always the one friends, family, even strangers think we should follow. Five years was a lifetime ago, and yesterday. So was ten years. Hugs.
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Hugs back. Do you find yourself saying “he’d like that”
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Wallow away, Mona. I do the same while leading a busy life with a second husband, writing, many cats thanks to daughter and recovering from bad fall. I had a dream where a nurse beckoned me. She said, “He’s waiting.” Hmm. I didn’t follow but it struck a nerve. My best to you always. Charmaine Gordon
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He knows I’m always late
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Lovely post, Mona, I agree, there is no timeline for a huge life-altering event like this. You are strong and you are a survivor. It shows in your post and the mere fact you’ve gone on to write more books and still cherish the wonderful memories. Good for you, girl.Sending blessings and good thoughts your way, Keta
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Thanks so much, Keta. We all have those decisions to make. Where do we go from here?
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Do not let anyone tell you when it is time. Only your heart knows when is when…
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