Unexplained Coffee

Melissa has a great story for us about what happens when coffee has a mind of its own.  Personally, I think it’s her sparkly personality!

Melissa Groeling

So this universe is just too damn big to have an explanation for everything. Case in point: I went to Saxby’s—for those of you not familiar with Saxby’s, this is a coffee shop—the poor man’s answer to Starbucks but just as tasty. I purchased a delicious white chocolate mocha. Now don’t peg me for a liar. I know my tag line reads “Tea Drinker.” Just let it be known, for the record, that I do NOT in fact like straight coffee. But different flavored coffees I can get behind, hence the white chocolate mocha and seriously anyway? How do you say no to chocolate? White or otherwise?

So I purchased this beverage then proceeded to Target. Like any good shopper, I left my beverage in the car because I know myself too well that I would spill it on a clothing rack full of shirts. I browsed through the store, didn’t find what I was looking for so then trekked empty-handed back to the car. Upon sliding in behind the wheel, I noticed with shock that my beverage had somehow exploded all over my center console! The lid was half-off and there was white chocolate mocha EVERYWHERE! I was so dumbfounded, I just kind of sat there and gaped silently, eyes wide like an owl but without the cute hooting because clearly this was nothing to hoot about. Then logic cracked me upside the head and I jumped from the car, thinking that some moron had backed into my car, thus rustling the contents inside. I ran around the vehicle, checking and rechecking but…there was nothing. No dents, no dings, no scrapes.

I stood there for about five minutes, thinking, confused, looking around, growing even more confused. I couldn’t even get angry, really, because there was nothing and no one to get angry at. It didn’t make sense. After a few more minutes of fumbling and raking my hands through my hair as if that would help conjure up an explanation, I got back in my car and drove home. Every few seconds, I would cast uneasy glances down at the splattered coffee as if the dripping mess would reveal some kind of clue as to why and how they’d ended up OUTSIDE the cup instead of INSIDE.

Some things cannot be explained. Maybe someday….someday….

blog: http://melissagroeling.blogspot.com
twitter: @stringbean10

Traffic Jam, a young adult novel, is coming out from Black Opal Books the end of May

Thanks for the giggle, Melissa!


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9 responses to “Unexplained Coffee

  1. It might remain a mystery like how they built the Pyramids and Stonehenge, Melissa. And I doubt there’s a poltergeist living in your car. More likely, there’s a scientific explanation. Heat expanding or something, science not being my strong suit.


  2. Thanks so much for letting me post here, Mona!


  3. livrancourt

    I hate it when things jump around like that. Now good ol’ black coffee would NEVER behave so wildly.


  4. That’s funny! Hope it cleaned up ok without leaving stains on the upholstry. May be it was hot in your car. Or the milk fermented or something.


  5. If you over on my end of the country I’d say it was the heat, but umm…I don’t think that will work here…maybe evil tea gremlins?


  6. Maybe Starbucks slipped in and sabotaged for not buying from them, LOL.


  7. How many packs of sugar did you put in?? Maybe your coffee had a sugar high then crashed. Who knows?

    Fun post. If you ever find out, please let us know.



  8. You guys crack me up! If I ever find out, I’ll let you know—must be little gnomes under my car seat or something….


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